Not Too Normal

Right now, I'm trying to grasp how much power a few pills can have. Pills kill people, or at least they can make us feel like we want to die.
Pills are the ex-lover I fight not to call or write anymore so that I can be happy again. And they're right, I need them more than they need me, and sometimes that thought soothes my mind. I question if an average life is worth trying new pills and getting over my old lover.

So maybe the quantitative argument is that science can't be right this time. The fact is, maybe there can be no fact about someone's mind. Scientists can keep trying to understand neurotransmitters, but something as complex as the human brain, even more so the universe just might not need to be explained, but felt. The answer is simple, through faith, we will seek understanding, not science.

Now how do I tell this to my doctor as my reason for not wanting to pills again? How do I weigh the options of which one will kill me slower so I can stay a minute longer in the end?